

unsolicited advice
for the end of times
by Michael Seidenberg
The first year of Michael's Unsolicited Advice, all together and better than ever.
“Hey, they’re back. What’s up with that? Why is that end-of-times guy still yapping away instead of eating canned goods in a bunker somewhere?”
There might be a temptation to rush into forming an end-of-times plan, but I would warn against any fast moves.
We are told again and again to expect the unexpected.
For the last week I have wanted to talk to you about procrastination.
As we start to grasp the reality of the upcoming end of times, many of us will feel tempted by a “We Are the World” way of thinking.
I was having difficulty concentrating lately until I got a delivery from my marijuana provider, who is also a dairy farmer.
A little fog will always help clear things up
You’re probably thinking that I’m choosing to interpret things the way I want to, seeing what I want to see. Well, right you are.
It doesn’t always help to be intelligible
The little things we love will be ever so important as our days dwindle away
As time goes by, knowledge grows and we have to grow with it
When the lighter was invented, people did not abandon matches, and when the ever popular vibrator popped on the scene, no one made a case for getting rid of the penis. Well, some people did
I only agreed to write this end of times advice column for the obvious reason, the end was near. Now it’s been two years and it’s still kicking.


by Michael Seidenberg
